A 38-year-old woman wrote us a letter about a terrible thing that happened to her. She just found out why her husband was whispering about his best friend to someone else. Now she doesn’t know what to do.

The woman seemed happy in her relationship, and her life seemed pretty normal.

Anna, who is 38 years old, told us her story, which may speak to many people who are afraid of ending a happy relationship.

Anna began her letter by talking about her marriage to Dylan, which has been going on for over ten years. They met in fourth grade and began dating when they were seventeen. “I love my husband,” she said from the bottom of her heart. Dylan is the whole thing. He’s really cute, funny, smart, and, of course, good-looking. My husband is the person I thought I would spend the rest of my life with because he makes my life so great.

Anna said this about their group of friends: “We went to the same schools from elementary school through college.” We both made our own groups of friends during this time. Dylan has always had stronger ties to his friends than I have, but over time, I joined their group as well. I wasn’t invited to many of their events, but that didn’t bother me much.

Anna went on, “I didn’t think about it too much because, well, these are his friends, and he doesn’t see them nearly as often as he sees me.” It’s not my place to get in the way.

Anna has always been interested in Dylan’s best friend.

She told Dylan, “His best friend Kevin knew him before he met me,” I didn’t know much about Kevin until recently. Our wedding wasn’t with him, and he didn’t go to the same schools as us. In fact, I didn’t know if he was friends with anyone in our group. He didn’t come to our house very often, and I’ve only met him three times. I thought this was because of his job, since Dylan said Kevin traveled a lot.

Anna talked about her interactions with Kevin and said, “Our relationship didn’t start off smoothly.” I didn’t see him very often, but when I did, something wasn’t right. Dylan and I went to a BBQ put on by another couple in our group of friends two years ago. Even though Kevin was there, I didn’t recognize him at first. When I did see him in person for the first time, he kept his distance, which I now know was on purpose. I have to say, though, he’s so handsome that he could be a model.

Anna went on, “When I tried to start a conversation with him, he seemed nervous and turned off the conversation after only a few sentences.” When I told our friends about his strange behavior, they said it was just the way he is. Some people even said I might have said something to make him mad. Basically, no one wanted to talk to me about Kevin. When someone talked about him, there was silence.

Anna also saw that her husband was acting in a strange way.

Anna said that when she tried to talk to Dylan about Kevin’s behavior, Dylan told her that Kevin just didn’t like her. “I was completely confused because I hadn’t done anything to offend him,” Anna said. When Dylan and I were on break, Kevin was mad at me because I was seeing another guy in college while Dylan and I were together. This took place many years ago, and Dylan said Kevin was just being stubborn.

Anna didn’t understand what was going on but put it off until one day. “A few weeks ago, Dylan told me he was going fishing with one of his cousins,” she said. That same night, I had a small party at my house for just girls and invited some female friends.

One of them, Lily, was on social media when I saw a strange picture going over her shoulder. It was a new picture of Kevin and Dylan in a hot tub together. When I asked Lily about it, she avoided my questions and looked tense. I took her phone and looked at the profile where the picture was posted.

Anna found out a bad truth about her husband and his friend.

When I found Dylan’s private profile, I was shocked to see pictures of him and Kevin on it. Some showed them hanging out by themselves, and others showed their group of friends, but not me. Many of the pictures made them look too close, like they were doing things that friends normally wouldn’t do.

Anna could feel the weight of the truth in the air when she asked Lily to explain herself. It was clear that Lily and the others knew what was going on because she looked at me with desperation. Anna told Dylan, “Dylan and Kevin had been having an affair and dating secretly since we were in college, even when Dylan and I were on break.” Our friends knew about this, but they didn’t tell me until I found out myself.

Anna went into more detail about the lie when she said, “Kevin avoided our wedding and stayed away from me out of guilt.” There was even a group chat where everyone supported Kevin but me. She admitted that she was having a hard time: “I’m at a loss.” It’s hard for me to leave Dylan because he’s been a great partner, but I can’t stand competing with Kevin. The pain is breaking me apart.

Anna got up the nerve to tell Dylan about his affair.

Anna talked about Dylan’s first denial: “At first, Dylan tried to deny everything.” He said Kevin was just a close friend and nothing more. But Anna kept going because she was determined to find out the truth. “I know what’s been going on, Dylan,” she remembered telling him. I have seen the pictures and heard what our friends have told me. Finally, Dylan told Kevin that he was having an affair with her. He said they had been seeing each other for years without me knowing.

Anna kept her cool as she demanded answers from Dylan, even though the news hurt her. “I asked him why he had kept this secret from me for so long,” she said. It was important for me to know why he broke my trust. Anna thought about Dylan’s answer and said, “He felt bad about what he did and said he regretted it.” But what he said couldn’t fix the damage he did.

In the end, Anna admitted that the situation was very serious and that she would have to make some tough choices. She wrote, “It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do to talk to Dylan about his affair.” Now it’s up to me to make the hard choice of what to do next with our marriage.

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