Sometimes having a best friend is more important than having a sibling. Friends are people who should be there for us at both our best and worst times. The main character of today’s story didn’t get much respect or attention from her best friends, and they never wanted to share important parts of their lives with her. When the woman got engaged, though, things changed. She saw the worst sides of people who ignored her but expected to be treated with respect in return.

Anna has five best friends, and things used to be great between them.

At 33 years old, Anna, one of our readers, wanted us to publish her confession. All she wanted was to read what other readers thought and get advice about her difficult friendships and her final decision.

The woman said, “Hi!” as she opened her letter. I’d like to know what other people think about my strange and somewhat frustrating situation right now. I’m 33 years old and have five best friends that I’ve met over the years. I’m older than all of them, but not by much. There are three men and two women. “Our relationship with each other has been very friendly and warm, and we get together as a team a lot.”

“I’ve always thought of them as best friends, not just friends or acquaintances, because we’ve been through a lot together and they knew they could always count on me for support, a helping hand, or a shoulder to cry on.” When I was really broke and couldn’t make ends meet, they often gave me money to help me get through hard times. Watching their kids was never a big deal for me.
Though I’m no longer going through hard times, something from the past has suddenly come back to hurt my relationships with everyone.

Anna’s friends didn’t want to tell her about their most important events.

She wrote, “All of my friends are married, and some of them even have kids that I used to babysit sometimes.” Even though my team was very friendly, I was never invited to any of my friends’ weddings.

“To be fair, I get it, and I don’t blame anyone.” I didn’t have a job when they got married, so I couldn’t really give them nice gifts and everything. I even borrowed money from friends, but I always paid it back. I didn’t have much to offer when they all got married besides making room for someone who could give them really great wedding gifts.
Not being invited really doesn’t bother me at all. Without a doubt, I would not have done this to any of them when they were at their worst, but I respect their choice.”

“We’re still good friends, and I have never told any of them they did something wrong.” Certain of them I talk to every day, and others at least three or four times a week. We have a WhatsApp group chat where we share photos, such as ones from their weddings and other events.

Anna’s life is getting better in every way now that she is engaged.

“After a pretty long time of really hard times, I finally managed to get a decent job,” Anna said. I worked very hard to get where I am now, and I’m even putting money away to buy my own apartment. There have also been some good changes in my personal life. While I was on a business trip, I met the man of my dreams. We fell in love right away.

“Just five months after we started dating, my now-fiance Josh asked me to marry him, and I said yes right away.” I am now engaged and very happy, but to my surprise, my best friends began to ruin my life with mean things they said and did. I can’t believe that people who are so important to me would suddenly become a source of stress for me instead of being happy for me when things are going well. What’s worse is that my wedding is coming up.”

Anna’s friends want to treat her with the respect they didn’t show her before.

Anna wrote, “They made a separate WhatsApp group to be mad at me for not telling them I’m engaged.” I then asked them why I would.
They were all shocked, but I told them that I didn’t think we were the kind of friends who would do something like that. Not only did they not tell me about their engagements and weddings, I found out about them after the parties and ceremonies. So I asked them what else they thought I should do. Our group video call ended all of a sudden.”

“Later, one of my friends came to me alone.” Because we are such close friends (and always have been), he said he doesn’t know why he didn’t invite me. He even said he has always felt bad about it, and he was proud to tell me that my name was the first one he put down for their 5-year anniversary party.

“I really think and feel that this whole thing is fishy.” It doesn’t bother me, though. Even though it hurt, I was able to let go of the idea that I had a right to know about my friends’ lives. That’s why I never asked them about getting married.
I told each of them how proud I was and always wished them the best. They didn’t invite me, but I never asked why. I still don’t want any of them to be at my wedding. I have asked some other friends of ours to come to my wedding, but I don’t want my best friends to come. Am I wrong?”

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