Listen to this story about a husband who was torn between love and betrayal. His wife broke the rules because her best friend told her to, which destroyed the foundation of their marriage. Now that the event is over, he has to make a tough choice: he has to support her happiness or stay strong in his own pain.

He talked about what happened.

A few years ago, my wife had an affair. I learned that she suddenly used a lot more data on her phone. I looked into it, saw the number on the bill, and knew it was her ex. Of course, she denied it, which is what made me look through her phone. She tried to hide what she was doing, but she didn’t delete the texts she sent to her best friend telling her about everything and bragging about it. Her friend was there for her and sometimes even told her to keep having an affair.

Things are pretty good between us now that we’ve made up, but I’m still very angry at her friend. Partly because I told her to do the right thing instead of encouraging her to do what she did, and partly because her messages with her friend caused me so much pain and suffering. I still think about the affair when I see or hear her friend’s name.

She is the maid of honor at her friend’s wedding coming up in a few months. I’ve been feeling a lot of stress about having to go. I finally thought it was time to protect myself. I would be miserable the whole time, and the thought of celebrating the marriage of someone who at least severely disrespected mine makes me sick.

She got very angry when I told her I was going to stay home instead. I thought she was angry instead of hurt when she said that. That was the last time I heard from her. I told her why I felt the way I did and what I thought, but she just kind of ignored me.

For starters, I don’t feel like the bad guy because I didn’t choose to feel this way; her actions made me feel this way. Two, she was the one who said her friend was having an affair; if she hadn’t, there wouldn’t be a problem. In addition, I didn’t say she couldn’t or shouldn’t go; in fact, I told her she should and offered to drive her there and back. Am I being a jerk?

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