Dan learned this while on a family vacation that was supposed to be happy and festive. Money problems often cause fights in families. After being told that everything would be taken care of, he was asked to help pay for a birthday present. This last-minute request ruined the trip, so Dan came to us for help.

Letter from Dan:

“For my father-in-law’s 60th birthday, my in-laws invited the whole family to Florida.” All the costs, like tickets, hotel, food, etc., were said to be covered.

My mother-in-law asked each of us to bring $100 for the birthday gift on the first day we were there. “I’m not going to pay one dollar!” My wife was among those who were quiet.

My mother-in-law got up out of the blue after eating the cake. She told her husband, “We all got you a special gift for your 60th birthday,” which scared me. She stopped talking in the middle of her sentence and said, “Well, almost everyone.” Dan thought $100 was too much to spend on his dad-in-law’s birthday!”

When I got back to our hotel room later that night, I was horrified to find that all of my wife’s things were gone; she had packed her bags and left for the vacation. “You made me look bad in front of my whole family,” she wrote on the note she left me.

I don’t believe I’m wrong here. It would have been nice to know ahead of time that we had to pay. I felt lied to. Was what I did wrong?

Dan”

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