When a wife finds out that her husband has invited his mother on their trip without asking her first, she feels ignored and disrespected. She gets very angry. She can’t hold back her anger because what was supposed to be a romantic getaway for the two of them has turned into an unplanned family trip.
She told us what happened.
“Though my husband and I live in the U.S., we like to travel abroad every six months because we’re digital nomads. This year we’re in Brazil, first exploring the northeast and then going south. Last year we went to Thailand. Since we are from Brazil, our whole family lives here.
In different cities, we’re doing different amounts of time. We’ve already spent a month in Fortaleza. Next up is São Luã (10 days), then Maceió (2 weeks), then other cities in the south, and finally, we’ll all be back in our hometowns for two months.
We are having a great time together as a couple, just the two of us and our little dog. But I just found out last night at dinner that he and his mom chose ON THEIR OWN for her to come with them on the whole two-week trip to Maceió. I lived in a small apartment with my mother-in-law for two weeks. We can’t go back now that we’ve made up our minds and booked our flights.
I get that he and his mom live in different countries and miss each other, but he will be spending TWO MONTHS with her in his hometown after the trip, so that’s plenty of time to enjoy her company.
My point is that I had nothing to do with making the decision. As a married couple, I think you should talk about this before making a choice like this. “Babe, would it be okay if I brought my mom with me to Maceió?” For two weeks straight?”
I was going to try to talk him down to one week, but he didn’t even give me a chance to say what I thought or let him know if I was okay with it. I feel very disrespected because he is acting like my opinion doesn’t matter and he will do what he wants, no matter what I feel or think. It was like I just had to deal with it.
So this is what happened when I found out: I got into a fight with him right away during dinner (I tried to be quiet), and it was clear that I was mad. I was letting him know how angry and hurt I was that I had no say in the decision.
He was very angry that I wasn’t completely thrilled and happy that his mom was coming to stay with us for two weeks (he thinks I should be, even though I was shocked), and he even took off his wedding band to show me, “Either you accept my mom or we can go our separate ways.” He even said things like, “If you and I get divorced, we’re going to share Penny, our dog.” LIKE?!?! Please excuse me, sir!”
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