Lisa (28 years old) talked about a very awkward situation she had with some friends while they were just hanging out. What began as a fun conversation about fitness turned into an embarrassing public display that made her feel weak and hurt. Lisa was shocked when her husband made a casual comment about her body in front of everyone. She began to think about not only how she reacted, but also how we talk to our loved ones about difficult topics.
Lisa tells her story:
“My husband and I were having fun with some friends over the weekend when something happened that I still can’t get out of my mind.” In the group was Sara, a younger woman in her early 20s who is really into working out. When she started talking about how she works out, my husband, who also lifts weights, joined with her. I didn’t mind at first, but then things changed.
Sara told my husband that she was working on getting her personal trainer certification. He looked at me with a drink in his hand and smiled. “Oh, my wife will be your first success story!” She wants to lose weight but doesn’t feel like it. She might be able to get that killer body too with your help.”
“I stopped moving.” Did he really say that? In front of everyone? It wasn’t just the words; it was also how careless he was about it. As if my body problems were funny or something that everyone should hear.
I was ashamed and embarrassed. I tried to laugh it off, but I was really sad and wanted to cry. He wasn’t meaning to be mean, but what he said hurt a lot. It wasn’t about the weight; it was about how he made my insecurities public and treated me like I needed to be “fixed” by a fitness trainer.
Thoughts of the event keep going through my mind, making me question whether I overreacted or whether I have every right to be as hurt as I am.
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